Target: The never-ending money-sucking vortex

So the roommate and I went to Target last night, because for Easter my mom got me a gift card, and insisted I use it to buy a dress. Not gonna fight with that request, however it would've been nice if I just picked out a dress.

Which by the way, the clothes are usually what I need to avoid. Go in to get garbage bags and come out with $50 worth of clothes... They are just staring you down right by registers. Nice marketing tactic Target!

I used to buy my groceries there when I lived in Madison, but I learned my lesson the hard way.. You are not walking out with just bananas, milk, and bread..

Because first there is the dollar section, and who knows when you will need those little trinkets. Then let's take a walk back to the shoes, yup in love with every pair. Next to the shoes are Targets cute socks, which are the only kind I wear. And they are only $1.50.. Might as well get 5 pairs.

And then there's the stupid clearance caps at the end of the aisles. Yeah I don't really need any of it. But 30% off basically makes it free.

Thank goodness the home decor section is in the back so I don't need to pass that. Because something would've ended up in my basket, and to think I was set on not grabbing a basket.

Oh the workout stuff, if only I could wear comfy clothes to work every day, it's just all so cute..

The swimsuits, surely summer is coming soon. No you don't need any more suits, you aren't a lifeguard.

Finally hit the dresses, ahh if they had my size in all of them, I would probably have them all.

But across the aisle, I can see the scarves, yup really shouldn't walk over there.. Will power Sam, will power.

Also needed to grab a white T-Shirt, why on Earth are there 15 different styles, what's the difference!?!? It's just a white T-Shirt!!!

Now the professional clothes, I mean it's for work right.. That's always justification.

Why is there a whole city block worth of women's clothes!!! Ahh finally this looks like the maternity section, I can be done looking..

So wait what did I come here for again?

Well played Target, well played.. Just take my stupid money already.

No lady, I do not want to sign up for a Red card, I don't need more incentive to come here!

-The average Target suckered girl

I swear I am a good driver.. It's just bad luck!

I swear I am a good driver.. It's just...
Bad Luck!

And it’s time to open my own garage..

I hate to feed into the stereotype that women are bad drivers, but I admit I am not good.. It’s getting to the point of ridiculous how bad my luck is..

No shame, I am going to blame it on luck… Okay fine, it’s probably just me.

The other day I was driving back from my parent’s and my car started jerking back and forth, and grinding like it does when it is slipping on ice, even though it was a beautiful day!

Not to mention that within the past 4 months, I have had to replace all 4 tires, all on separate occasions. Honestly how does that happen.. Driving back from Missouri and thump, thump, thump… Of course, might as well make it a complete set!

Any ladies out there know how to put on a spare? Kudos, because I am far from it. Well actually I milk it, because I do know how, I would just prefer not to! SHHHH.

Here’s the deal, I drove my first car for over 7 years, and there was not a spot on that car that did not have a dent in it. Cut me a break, when I lived in Madison, people would back into your car without a second thought to parallel-park.

And the semi that cut me off in snow and made me spin around 5 times through two lanes on the triple lane highway and stop by hitting a guardrail. SEE, not my fault!

We at that point decided that car was cursed and it was time for a new one. So just got a new car last January, but nope it was just me.. So far in 14 months of having the car, I’ve had 4 flat tires, a broken off mirror, replaced brakes, a trailer hitch dented license plate, a gas tank door that I have to be the Hulk to open, and now a car that jerks like it has a nervous twitch. OH and let’s not forget when the window fell in, you seriously can’t make this stuff up..

I am thinking if I put one more dollar in that car this year, I would be better off just opening a garage so I can get things fixed for free. Or maybe it’s time to invest in a new car, third one has to be the charm! I think an army tank would be my best option..

My stepmom says the first thing she would buy if she won the lottery was a personal driver for me, anyone willing to donate to the cause?!

Your average terrible driver girl

Here is the imprint of the guardrail incident.

Little gameday fender bender.

One of 4 within 4 months, seriously how!?

Having to unload the trunk on a roadtrip to get to the spare for ANOTHER flat tire.

A woman's true love

I think men think that women's wish in life is to find the perfect man, tall, dark, handsome. But let's be honest, most women's true wish is to have a Carrie Bradshaw shoe closet.

Okay so the ever pressing question..

Can a woman ever have too many shoes?

Personally, I think NO! I have a ton, last count was 55 pairs, and that is always growing. But I also refuse to spend more than about $30 on any pair, unless it’s boots.

Okay, I also am a sucker for Toms’ shoes.. And they are a little bit more expensive, but go for a good cause, because for every pair bought, they donate a pair of shoes to someone in need. So in total now, I have helped 7 people get shoes! So that is justification right?!

I am also a sucker for Sperry’s, but they are just so cute and comfortable, and I grew up on a boat so they fit perfectly! Okay that is not justification.

If there is a great deal, it is game over.. Shoe sales = bye money.. Especially Payless’ Buy One, Get One 50% off.

My true love: high heels, but I have so many, that there just isn’t even enough time to wear them all. And if I find a comfortable pair, I find myself wearing those all the time, and abandoning my other ones.

Flip-flops should not count in the total number, because I go through flip-flops like crazy in summer. Losing a pair every time I tube on the Wolf River. And you can get a pair for like $2.

One thing I struggle with is how to organize my shoes. I have a rack that has slots for each shoe, but it looks kind of messy, especially because I put two pair in each slot. Any helpful hints on this?

I think women’s obsession with shoes is something men will never understand, but there truly isn’t much a new pair (or two pairs because you just can’t decide!) of shoes can’t fix!

Let’s have a contest, who has the most pairs?! Because I know there are many women that even have my 50+ beat!

Your average shoe loving girl

I mean you never know what color you'll need.

Unfortunately there are 2 pairs missing, highly recommend
these! So comfy!

Yup some have to sit on the floor..

It's a terrible mess I know, help! And these aren't even all of them!

And my life motto..